Islamic
teachings on the Importance of Parents
Say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address them in
terms of honour. - Quran 17:23
In Islam it is obligatory for us to show
kindness, respect, and obedience to our parents. The position of parents, and
the mutual obligations and responsibilities, have been addressed in Islam in
great detail. In fact kindness and obedience is so strongly emphasized that God
has linked showing gratitude to one's parents with showing gratitude to God -
And We have enjoined on man (to be good) to
his parents: in travail upon travail did his mother bear him, and in years twain
was his weaning: (hear the command), "Show gratitude to Me and to thy parents:
to Me is (thy final) Goal. (31:14)
Sadly we are living in a time where children
speaking disrespectfully to their parents and about their parents, is the norm
rather than the exception. However Islam places great emphasis on respectful and
considerate behaviour to even our enemies, so to not uphold the obligations laid
down by God to our parents is actually one of the major sins.
In the Quran
Let's see what the Quran says about Parents. This is the
Book; in it is guidance sure, without doubt, to those who fear God (2:02)
Treat parents with honour & speak to
them graciously & with humility
Thy Lord hath decreed that ye worship none
but Him, and that ye be kind to parents. Whether one or both of them attain old
age in thy life, say not to them a word of contempt, nor repel them, but address
them in terms of honour. And, out of kindness, lower to them the wing of
humility, and say: My Lord! Bestow on them thy Mercy even as they cherished me
in childhood. (17:23)
Be grateful to parents but do not obey
them if they strive to make you associate things with God
...Be grateful to Me and to both your
parents; to Me is the eventual coming. But if they strive to make thee join in
worship with Me things of which thou hast no knowledge, obey them not; yet bear
them company in this life with justice (and consideration), and follow the way
of those who turn to me (in love): in the end the return of you all is to
Me, then will I inform you of what you did (31:15)
These verses make it clear that we must honour
our parents, appreciate their sacrifices and efforts for us, and do our best for
them. This is required regardless of whether they are Muslims or not.
Be good to parents and everyone else
who you meet
Serve God, and join not any partners with
Him; and do good- to parents, kinsfolk, orphans, those in need, neighbours who
are near, neighbours who are strangers, the companion by your side, the wayfarer
(ye meet), and what your right hands possess: For God loveth not the arrogant,
the vainglorious;- (4:36)
If the Quran tells us to be good to a stranger
how can we even think of disrespecting our parents?
Hadiths
Let's see what Prophet Muhammad
said about parents in the authentic Hadiths. Whatsoever the Prophet gives
you, take it and whatsoever he forbids you, refrain from it. - Quran 59:7
Disobedience to parents is a major sin
Anas narrated from Prophet Muhammad
about
the major sins. He (Mohammed) observed: Associating anyone with God,
disobedience to parents, killing a person and false utterance. (Muslim)
One of the dearest deeds to God is
being good & dutiful to parents
Narrated 'Abdullah: I asked the Prophet
"Which
deed is the dearest to God?" He replied, "To offer the prayers at their early
stated fixed times." I asked, "What is the next (in goodness)?" He replied, "To
be good and dutiful to your parents"...(Bukhari)
Being dutiful to parents is one of the keys to enter Paradise
Abu Huraira reported Prophet Muhammad
as saying: Let him be humbled into dust; let him be humbled into dust. It was
said: God's Messenger, who is he? He said: He who sees either of his parents
during their old age or he sees both of them, but he does not enter Paradise
(because he has been undutiful to them). (Muslim)
Acts of kindness we can do for our
parents after their death
While we were with Prophet Muhammad of God
. A
man of Banu Salmah came to Him and said: Apostle of God is there any kindness
left that I can do to my parents after their death? He replied: Yes, you can
invoke blessings on them, forgiveness for them, carry out their final
instructions after their death, join ties of relationship which are dependent on
them, and honour their friends. (Abu Dawood)
The High Status given to Mothers
A man came to the Prophet
and
asked him for permission to join a military expedition. The Prophet
asked
him if he had a mother, and when he replied that he had, he said, "Stay with
her, for Paradise is at her feet." (Ahmad)
Summary
Sometimes we may take our parents for granted
and overlook their importance. As Muslims we should constantly be alert to guard
ourselves from sins, however, are we guarding ourselves from one of the biggest
major sins? Are we honouring and respecting our parents as per their right? Or
are we neglecting one of the deeds most dearest to God? Right now the choice is
ours!
We ask God the Most High, the All-Powerful, to
teach us that which will benefit us, and to benefit us by that which we
learn.
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Peace and Blessings of God be upon him.
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