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Thinking about
duty
In this beautiful, uplifting article English convert to Islam, Ruqaiyyah
Waris Maqsood, talks to young Muslims about their responsibilities to the people
in their lives and to Allah.
When people are parents, teachers
etc, they have to cope with the very young, and life seems to revolve around
their care, safety, warmth, food, clothing, education, and so forth. It is a
particularly worrying time for new first-time parents, who may not have paid too
much attention up until then on how to do all the various things that need
doing.
The problem for you, as youngsters
growing older, is that of knowing at what stage you begin to have duties of your
own, and what those duties are, and how you should go about doing them. It is so
frustrating when you are told you are too young to do half the things you would
like to do, and too old to do the other half. Parents seem to have such a knack
of manipulating this age business, and since they are so much older and more
experienced, they usually get away with it - leaving you steaming with pent-up
frustration. Maybe not so pent-up, if you are not very self-controlled. We all
know youngsters who can let you know about their frustrations and annoyances
from half a mile away.
Quite frankly, I have a very
strong feeling that it is no compliment to a child to be regarded as a child. I
can remember when I was twelve, being furious and hurt that no-one would take me
seriously when I wanted to do great things, run clubs, make people rehearse
plays, help the suffering, etc. I was only a child! That made me furious - I did
not think of myself as a child at all, and although I cannot have known all that
much at that stage, I nevertheless had every confidence that I knew a lot, and
was even very likely to do a better job than half the adults I knew. I was a
conceited little brat, very obnoxious, I'm sure.
But when I eventually did manage
to find people who could see that I really did have great urges to save the
world, make everything better, do all sorts of wonderful works and so on, it was
so satisfying to be used. To be trusted. To be given something useful to do. I
threw my whole effort into it, and swore I would never let down the people who
had trusted me.
As a young boy before his call to
Prophethood, I should imagine the Prophet (pbuh) went through some of that too.
He had to grow up fast in a fairly harsh environment. You know that he started
off in a 'single-parent family', since his father died before he was born. Then
his mother died when he was only six and he lived with his Grandad for two
years, and finally got brought up by a very kind uncle and aunt. By the time he
was twelve he was already at work, and had already earned the nickname 'the
Trustworthy One.' If an adult wanted a job done and needed a youngster to do it
- who to choose? The trustworthy one was the lad to pick. He wouldn't let you
down, or get it wrong, or forget to do it, or make a mess of it. He was
reliable, and he always told the truth.
By the age of fifteen he had
fought in his first battles. He became a caravaneer, a merchant trader. He had
many hard-working and much respected friends who were also merchant traders. Two
were Abu Bakr ibn Quhafah and Uthman ibn Maz'un. They had always been good kind
men too, long before the revelation of Islam. They grew up believing that there
was a real God who cared about justice, and like all good people did their best
to do their duty towards their families, their friends, their business contacts,
and people who needed help. They had probably visited the same places, and maybe
even done deals together.
When the three young men were in
their twenties, it was time to marry, and one lady who wanted to marry the
Prophet (pbuh) was Khadijah's niece, Khawlah bint Hakim. As it happened, the
Prophet (pbuh) did not choose to marry her, and married his boss, Khadijah,
instead. Uthman married the disappointed Khawlah. Nevertheless, they all
remained very good friends, and Khawlah acted as a kind of aunt to the Prophet's
(pbuh) children. Years later, when Khadijah died, Khawlah took over a lot of the
housework for him, and in due course helped to arrange his next marriage - to
another widow, Sawdah bint Zam'ah, and then to Aishah, the young daughter of his
other great friend Abu Bakr.
Both Abu Bakr and Uthman went on
to become leading Muslims. However, Uthman spent more and more time at his
prayers, meditations and study of the Qur'an. He never missed a prayer, and
prayed more extra prayers than anyone else. He frequently prayed all night. He
disciplined his body with constant fasting, far more than other Muslims did, and
ate little when he did eat. Completely devoted to Allah, he began to withdraw
more and more from the life of this world.
One day, Khawlah turned up in a
state of distress. She was suffering from marriage problems. Uthman was always
so occupied with his religious devotions that he totally neglected her, and had
become very difficult to live with. In his devotion to duty towards Allah,
Uthman had not understood the most vital teaching of Islam - that Islam is not
just a matter of prayers and study, but a complete way of life. It does not mean
a person should withdraw from the world, but work in the world - to help others
and make life better for people. Islam applied to every aspect of daily life, to
study at school, to being honest and reliable at work, to relaxation, to
relationships, to the way people treated their partners and family, to their
attitude towards those less fortunate or less intelligent or less religious - in
fact, everything.
The Prophet (pbuh) went to see
Uthman.
'Do you dislike my ways, Uthman?'
he asked. Uthman was very surprised and assured him that he always tried to
follow his sunnah. The Prophet (pbuh) explained where he was not doing so.
'Uthman, I pray but I also sleep;
sometimes I fast and sometimes do not fast. I marry women.' He meant he enjoyed
their company. 'Uthman,' he continued, 'when you fear (have respect and
reverence for) Allah - you need to know that your wife has a right over you,
your guest has a right over you, and your self has a right over you.' He
requested him to be less extreme and to care more for his family and general
personal wellbeing. (Abu Dawud 1364).
When something 'has rights
over you', it means that you have duties to perform. Being a Muslim, and
'fearing' Allah involves so many duties - towards Allah, towards ourselves,
towards our relatives, our community, and the world at large, especially those
bits of it that need special help. It is not enough to say your prayers - but
then be mean, or lazy over helping others who need your help, or to sit around
expecting to be waited on while they get tired. It is not enough to study the
Qur'an, and then be selfish or greedy or deceitful. It is not enough to fast,
and then tell lies or cheat people. It is not enough to attend the mosque
regularly, and then be spiteful to people less able than yourself, or disruptive
in school upsetting those paid to train you, or shouting and abusive towards
girls, or to use foul dirty language and look at smutty pictures, or bully the
weak, or ridicule the ugly.
Many young Muslims are very
religious, like Uthman, but imagine if the Prophet (pbuh) came to visit them one
day, and said: 'Do you dislike my ways, Salmah (or Arif, or Sherzaman, or
Talulah, or James, or Platovic, or Khusraw, or Yung Chan, or Brigitte)?'
Think of his ways - the ways of
the True Messenger of Allah. He never told lies, or cheated. He was never
abusive or arrogant or bullying. He loved his followers, even if they got things
wrong sometimes and maybe made mistakes. He specially loved the young men who
were so brave, and loyal, and ready to sacrifice everything for the sake of
Allah. He loved his womenfolk and children. He took in other men's children and
brought them up. He bought slaves who were being badly treated and cared for
them with such love that many of them chose to remain living with him and
helping him even when granted their freedom and told they could go. He visited
the sick, not only his friends but even if they were people who had tormented
and abused him, even if they were not Muslims.
He cared for the fate of refugees,
prisoners, and especially prisoners of war, and organised arrangements for them
to sort out their lives and carry on. He encouraged his followers to learn as
much as they could, and educate themselves so that they would be useful citizens
who could help others, and not just be a drain on society. He encouraged his
womenfolk to act as nurses and teachers. He taught people it was important to be
clean, and health conscious, and physically fit and ready for action. He
cautioned people against becoming 'extreme', exhausting themselves in any aspect
of their lives if it meant neglecting other aspects. It was the Muslim's duty to
do the best he or she could, to be disciplined and create regular practice, and
not to look down on other people whose 'best' might be quite different. Each
person would be judged by his or her own life and effort - nobody else's. These
things were all a Muslim's duties - and were all really duties towards Allah.
Even if you were just being kind to an insect, it was a duty towards Allah well
done. Even if you just picked a sharp stone out the path of a poor blind beggar,
it was a duty towards Allah well done.
It is not easy to do all our
duties in life, but this is how we show real love - not only for the people we
care for, but also for Allah. It is what we mean by a sacrifice - being a shahid.
We may not have to be put to death for Allah's sake, but we might well have to
do some boring chores when we don't want to. We may not be clever enough to
learn the whole Qur'an by heart, but we might well have to be honest when it
would be so easy to be dishonest. We may not ever be noticed or thanked or
praised, but we have to remember we are not doing things for thanks, but simply
because we love Allah and these are our acts of love. Some of the Prophet's
(pbuh) greatest Companions were very simple people who did not have the ability
to learn much, but who gave everything they had to help others - and if
everything they had was only a small offering, it was worth just as much to
Allah as all the riches of the wealthy.
So, may Allah bless us with His
grace, and grant us the patience and determination and courage to take on
whatever duties He lays upon us, and bring us to success. Amin.
English convert to Islam,
Ruqaiyyah Waris Maqsood, is the author of over thirty books
on Islam and other subjects.
Email: Ruqaiyyah@aol.com
Website: http://members.aol.com/Ruqaiyyah
Read other articles by
Ruqaiyyah Waris Maqsood on this site here.
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